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A man walks into a bar and he has a pet octopus. He sits down at the bar and says to the bartender "give us two beers over here!" The bartender walks over and see's the octopus and he says, "Didn't you see the sign over there it says no pets allowed." The man say's to the bartender, "oh but you don't understand this is a special octopus and he can play any instrument that you have." The bartender replied back "well I'll tell you what if he can play any instrument you can both drink for free" The bartender went up to the band playing and he got a guitar. He put it down on the bar. The octopus crawled up on the bar and felt around the guitar for a little while when finally he picked it up and started playing it. He was so good he sounded like Jimi Hendricks! The bartender was amazed and at this point he said "alright lets try one more" This time he went into the back room and brought out a dusty old set of bagpipes promptly put them on the bar and said "lets see him play this." The octopus started crawling all over the bagpipes. He continued this for quite a while, when the bartender shouted out " See I knew he couldn't play all these instruments" The man replied, "Just give him a moment, as soon as he see's he can't have sex with it, He will play it!"